Well, hey there, Break-up!!
It's been a while since I've seen you. Though, let's be honest, I always know when you're coming. I'm really sorry I always try to delay your visit. And I confess, I know I'm not always happy to see you, but when our time together is through, I'm usually glad you came.
We've been quite the pair in the past, you and I. Carousing around town, drinking ALL of the drinks together, doin' some smooching. Most of our time is spent in a daze-y hangover and I don't pay enough to attention to, well, anything that isn't a pack of Parliaments or a beard. Admittedly I've quit smoking this time around, and the idea of another self-absorbed hipster fuck sounds treacherous, but together I know we always accomplish great things.
It's funny. People keep asking me how I'm doing now that you're in town. Then they look at me sideways when I earnestly answer that I'm doing just fine. Swell, even. I AM FUCKING FABULOUS. I'm actually so great that I'm sorry you didn't just break-up, too. They want me to cry, I guess? They expect me to sit at home in my house and feel things. GROSS. I mean, don't get me wrong, Break-up, we've had that kind of party before. But usually by the time your flight lands I'm all cried out and ready to play.
Do you know I've never been single? Did you hear me? I HAVE NEVER BEEN SINGLE. I've spent just as much time with New Love as I have you, Break-up, and I'm really hoping to avoid them at all costs right now. Can I tell you, Break-up, that I put together a fucking TV last night? By myself. Like, with a screwdriver. Admittedly it was only had 8 screws, but the point is that it felt way more awesome to do it by myself than to have a dude there doing it, the price of which comes in the form of the emotional currency of having to deal with someone else's bullshit.
I try not to do the dirty laundry dump in a public place when you're around, Break-up, because I mean, he has his own side of this story. The one where all my terrible bits will be exposed to all of his friends and family and if I were A. someone else entirely, or, B. inclined to worry about what other people think of me, I might feel that small twinge of regret. "God, I'll be remembered as the crazy controlling one." As it stands, I've been too busy to consider such things, as I have been making a list of the following things that make having you around wonderful:
1. Not living with the person you used to live with.
2. Everything else.
I'm sorry you always get such a bad rap, Break-up. I wish more people were OK with accepting you for who you are and welcoming you with open arms. You are always, whether they know it at the time or not, a source of great goodness, positive energy and new beginnings. And new smooches, which, really are the best part if you're not inclined to focus on all the hippie zen shit about you.
I'm glad you're here, even if I have been hammered 6 of the last 9 days. You just make yourself at home and stay as long as you like. I can't wait to watch movies with you on our new TV.
Love,
Jenn
